Re: FN-FORUM: OT - Custody of children for fathers

date posted 1st November 2006 20:45

Alain Williams wrote:

>On Wed, Nov 01, 2006 at 06:05:20PM -0000, Alistair Lamb wrote:
>
>
>>Hi,
>>I've been through the divorce thing and didn't seek custody but for what
>>its worth my understanding is:
>>main carer is a good thing
>>childrens' opinions taken by court welfare officer and has increasing
>>importance as they get older
>>
>>Courts will put their welfare first and then deal with divorce detail.
>>
>>
>
>Yes, but the line of thinking is: if mum is not happy then child will not be happy;
>so do what mum wants.
>
>
>
Not true unfortunately .
It is a complete lottery depending upon the judge you get ( I had three
different ones in four cases) and the quality of the
solicitor/barrister you get. Legal aid ones are notoriously slack. I
had varying experiences but have not yet found a solicitor whom I would
be happy to recommend.

In all cases the child is unhappy, the mum is unhappy and the dad is
unhappy
In my cases which seem to have been just about continual since I left my X
(first stupid move I should have thrown him out - but he was bigger
than me and absolutely denied the affair that I knew he had been having
for some time.)
The worst thing for me and my son is that fact that it never has been
"sorted out" eventually my X got his own way, mostly because he just
kept taking me to court regardless of my son's or my welfare until he
got the result he wanted.
Only he gets to be happy, ( and keep the former marital home - out of
which he will make a fortune!)
Just another sob story.
Carrie






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